{Underneath the Stars.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

i hate being E.M.O.

4:48 PM

sometimes, somehow, i become emo.
suddenly, with no obvious reason, or perhaps it's a complication.
unable to get a nice job, unable to earn money, unable to buy stuffs i want, unable to look good, unable to do things the way i want, unable to etc etc etc..
sometimes i just feel lousy. very lousy.
it's like im stuck somewhere out there, cannot move on or even back off.
i understand that life can be so unpredictable.
i can feel extraordinarily good at one moment, and the next second this feeling stops and i fall into deep pitch blackness. suffocating.

***
i dont feel like digging my mind to write out that bad, awful, terrible first working experience, yet i couldnt resist the anger and despair to want to complain it out loud.
i couldnt believe my first working experience to be this bad.
never did i expect that a store clerk would need to carry and shift stuffs here and there, from upstairs to downstairs, from inside to outside.
i thought it's just some simple task on desk where i sit around and key in data and barcodes and stuffs like that.
the supervisor did mention that a little bit of carrying might be involved during work but i never thought it would be heavy items.(it's just a store for shops selling gifts and accesories)
i thought there must be other male transport workers or something like that.
and yesh, there are, but they didnt seem to bother seeing me struggling in carrying stuffs, let alone helping me to carry them.
they are so so so not GENTLEMEN~ =X
no doubt a few of the workers there are nice, or maybe they seem to be (i wouldnt know since it's just my first day), but this job is really killing me!
never will i step into this kinda work anymore~
count myself bad luck, cos i couldnt even get my pay on that day bcos they told me it needs to be at least one week of working before getting paid!
the lady supervisor said she told me this before, but hey, i dont even remember she saying this!
well, in the end i just dont feel like arguing with her, i tried to be gentle and well-spoken, so i just said : ohh is it?!i dont realise~, but my heart saying : WTH is this?!!
and her tone of speaking immediately changed after i told her im quitting.
it's so true that the working world isnt a dreamland, it's like some kind of battlefield and there are so many things to learn!
well, i guess i have learnt a good one this time!
pros and cons, people need experience to grow up and improve~ i hope i am.
and i pity those female workers there, they seem to be suffering alot, with no proper mealtime and doing these hard works all the time under the awful supervision by that lady i mentioned above (this was what i heard them saying during lunch), but they are qutting soon (i feel glad for them too), that's why the place is hiring people.
i just hope that people in the management will do more for their workers' benefits.
so that they wont suffer so much and get better pay for their work.
anyway, i will never try this kind of job again, imagine having to work in dusty and uncomfortable environment. not like i dont have academic qualification.
and my whole body ached like hell after even one day of working.cannot even sleep well=(
so, i have no choice but to quit the next day.
sighxx...
working is truly not an easy matter..

***
seems like luck doesnt favour me these days=(
maybe that's why im feeling down, feeling blue..
can something happen to cheer me up?
*finger-crossing*
i wonder.

Saturday, May 23, 2009

what makes my holiday?

4:25 PM

"i aint gonna waste my holidays!!"
that's what im telling myself since the beginning of my three-month holidays but now, look at what i have done these far..??
jobless still, with idling mind, feel like rotting with every passing days..
tired of waiting. waiting for calls, waiting for interviews, waiting for something interesting or fulfilling to happen, waiting to earn money for spending and treating family and friends, and waiting for these wishes to come true.
and so i wait. i tried. and i failed.
i just hope that good news will come soon...
*finger-crossing*

anyway, whilst all these waiting-ss, i have learnt something!
i learn cooking! ;]
though still not very skilled at=S lolx~
and i got to spend some good times with dearest friends and buddies. watched good shows and movies. tasted nice food.
at least these are ways to convince myself a little for not wasting my free time;p

BIGGEST LOVE : JCO DOUGHNUT!!!!!

redbox outing with buddies. *too bad susu went off to work!nvm next time we camwhore again!!*

went for an TRA weight management workshop with family

LOVE-sssss : THE MELANCHOLY OF HARUHI SUZUMIYA!!!a must-watch!!
i like the sweet innocent romance between haruhi and kyon~

&&btw, i have gotten my last sem exam results!!!!
feel happy and contented!=)it's quite unexpected though ;S
and i have shown slight improvement=p will work hard as well in the next sem!!
congrats to everyone!!=)

***
ahhh cant wait to end my boring holidays!!!
get a life fenwei!!hope things will fall into places...
aza!

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

what the hell!

1:42 PM

it's TOTALLY wth!
i dont know what had happened!
the moment i signed on to my msn just a minute ago, one of my friends told me he received some weird emails from me, and what more, after few seconds, all my contacts just DISAPPEARED!!!
YES, ALL OF THEM!!
and i dont even know if they can see me in their msn as well~ ;[
anyone out there could tell me what has gone wrong??!
im pretty annoyed and frustrated right now!=(
HELP~~~
and if anyone received any weird emails or messages from me, im sorry about that and just ignored them okay!
god, i just hope all my contacts would come back to me!!!
ARRGGHHHH~~
super pissed off!!!!

Monday, May 11, 2009

time for some updates!

5:14 PM

i felt like i have abandoned my bloggie for such a long time!=X
so i guess it's time for a little updates=)
though nothing much has happened to be blogged about since i gained my three-months vacation after year 1 semester 2 final exam~
and i hardly realised that my first year in NTU has actually finished!=S
now that im watching my friends feeling excited about entering university as freshmen, i felt being "old" because next semester onwards im already a year 2 student!!how time flies~~
and i couldnt really imagine myself being a senior to guide juniors HAHAHAH!
ppl who know me well would know that im way too blur to guide juniors, esp in showing the correct direction, haha!
anyway, i hope i can help them as much as i can and try not to "mislead" them=pp
hope that this year's FOC(freshmen orientation camps) would be fun!!=)
and talking about holiday plan this time round, i earnestly hope that i wont be wasting this three-months time anymore!!
there's no denial that i have come up with my LONG LONG to-do list, somehow i doubt if i can fulfill them=(
anyway just wanna try my best!
*first thing first would be to settle myself into a job with decent pay, haha*
good luck and gambateh neh fenwei!!
*as a consequence of watching japanese shows since this holiday, i feel like im kinda adapting their way of speaking e.g. adding "ne" at the end of my sentences LOL*

well, just some random pics below from spore flyer outing with coursemates & mother's day treat ;]